We all share a journey... it's our life on our road to Eternity~
My journey is really too long to write... but I wanted to give you a glimpse of where I've been and where I am now... greatly anticipating where I'm going! :)
I was born in a Christian family and don't remember a time that I didn't know about God. I can always remember, as a child, how much I LOVED God. It wasn't until my high school years that I began to live contrary to what I had been taught (how I regret my choices! how THANKFUL I am for GRACE and FORGIVENESS!!). I was 19 years old when I fully REPENTED of my lifestyle and started living my life according to what I thought was right. I still made mistakes, but they were not a way of life any longer... and every part of my spirit, soul, and body belonged to God.
I married James in 1993 and we had our first child in 1994 (we now have 4 children). We were ALWAYS involved HEAVILY in what people call "The Ministry". We whole-heartedly "served the Lord" in this way... for 14 or 15 very fulfilling years :) We had even moved to James' town where he had grown up and had started 'pastoring' a small congregation (in the only way we knew how). We were VERY happy and doing EXACTLY what we thought we were suppose to be doing....then EVERYTHING CHANGED.
In 2006, YaHWeH began to speak to BOTH of us about the SAME thing at the SAME time... only we weren't telling each other (yet) what HE was showing each of us. We were afraid each other wouldn't understand... and we were barely "understanding" ourselves. But, as HE so often does, HE began to bring things together to both of us and reveal HIS purpose in what HE was doing in us. There is no possible way to record it all... but the result of it was that we stopped meeting "as a church" in the traditional way, and began learning (over a process of 5 years now... and we're still learning) a different way to live and experience life the way YHWH intended.
So... that's where we are now... just living and learning (with others) "how" to truly walk in the LIFE HE has brought to us. :)
The Voice~ Celtic Woman
This song isn't meant to be a 'spiritual' song (I don't think)... but I heard it during the time that "everything was changing" in my journey, and it really felt like YHWH was "speaking" to ME through the words of this song. It will always remain a special song to me because of that time and experience in my life and relationship with YHWH. <3
*Some Website Links you may enjoy:
The Conversation!
Video and audio teachings from various speakers,
from the Hebrew/Jewish perspective.
just click the picture...
The Ancient Hebrew Research Center
Teaching the Ancient Biblical Language of the Bible
through the study of the ancient Hebrew alphabet, culture, and philosophy
just click the picture...
Hebrew History
A site I created of Jeff A. Benner's YouTube videos, for
personal use to help me in my studies and to have quick
access when using them with my children in our Torah
and Hebrew lessons. I hope you find it helpful!
*This site is NOT a part of the Ancient Hebrew Research Center
and is NOT endorsed by Jeff A. Benner
*****
Revelation~ Third Day
This song says SO MUCH of how I was feeling for So Long during "that time" in my journey, especially the chorus... I'm very thankful to be a little further down the road now- with a LITTLE more "revelation" :)
-note: I never "lost the faith" or was trying to "find my way back home" as the song says, my particular need for direction and answers was different... but desperation for YHWH is the same, no matter the circumstance.
******
How Can I Keep From Singing~ Chris Tomlin
Indescribable~ Chris Tomlin
"The American Way" is a phrase we're all familiar with... which is logical since we are Americans and live in America... but I don't neccessarily agree with the opinion that we are to place our "standard for living" according to the geographical location of where we live or where we were born. We tend to be very patriotic humans (no matter our heritage) and very "proud" of "what" we are-- "wherever" we live. We're proud of our country, proud of our state, proud of our city... proud of our "good ol' country-boy" upbringing- or our "high society" social standing. We take pride in our family name, our favorite sports teams, our favorite 'stars', and even our favorite 'church denomination', congregation, preachers, worship leaders and singing groups, ETC... and we tend to conduct ourselves as a reflection of what we 'pride ourselves in' and the "image" we would like others to identify and assosiate us with. The way a nation, or even a remote village, lives-- the way they dress, foods they eat, music and dance they adere to, celebrations they have, and spiritual beliefs/practices-- all make up the culture of that people.
But do we ever consider GOD's culture? GOD's ways?
YHWH created humanity, and has --from the beginning-- revealed "Who" He IS to His creation. From the beginning He instructed Adam and Eve on how He desired them to live... have you ever wondered 'why' Cain and Abel (their sons) were bringing offerings to Him? And not only bringing offerings of any sort, but their first fruits. Abel even brought 'the fat thereof'. Did you ever wonder why? Did you ever wonder why YHWH 'judged' the offrerings-- and had respect unto Abel's? Look at Noah, after the flood... when they came off the ark... what was the first thing he did? He offered a burnt sacrafice (did you notice the mentioning of 'clean' and 'unclean' animals that were to be put on the ark?).
All these things are usually associated with the "children of Israel", the "10 Commandments", and the "Old Testement Law"... but I personally believe these things were revealed from the beginning-- as YHWH wanted His people (His creation) to KNOW what pleases Him and to KNOW how He expects them (us) to live. I think Adam, Eve, Cain, Abel, Noah, and the rest of the Living on earth at that time KNEW YHWH's desires.
This is merely speculation on my part, of coarse, we have no record of that as fact... but that's the way the evidence leads, in my opinion.
YaHWeH IS--always has been and always will be, therefore-- He always was, is, and will be "WHO" He IS and has revealed Himself to BE to His creation. And there seems to be hints of the same patterns and principles already in practice -- from the beginning-- long BEFORE "Exodus". I think He has gone to great lengths to always ensure that 'we' (humanity) KNOW how to please Him and how He desires us to live. After all, HE made this universe, this earth, and all things that are contained within. He has determined how things should work together, and "live".
He started with Adam and Eve, but they disobeyed and chose their own way... He started over with Noah, but mankind again ignored the way of his Creator, and chose his own way... YaHWeH, once again, searched the earth, and called a man named Abram to follow Him and live according to HIS way-- to set apart a people that would care about what He says. And He tried Abram (whom He called Abraham) with the sacrafice of his son, Isaac, to see if Abraham would be fully submitted to Him-- and he was! :)
Now, let's move forward- to Isaac's son, Jacob (whom He named Israel) and his twelve sons, which became the 12 tribes of Israel... to Moses leading them out of Egyptian bondage/slavery. YaHWeH delivered them from the heavy hand of Pharoh, to lead them to a land He promised to them. He made it clear to them what pleased Him and how He expected them to live. Those "things", His instructions to them-- His ways-- seem to be no different than what had been revealed of Him all along, up until that time. I think (Maybe) He caused it to be written down at that time, so that it would be continually before them--- TO KEEP HIS WAYS.
* Read Deuteronomy 30, especially vs.10-14,19-20.
Now--- most of those things are, in our 'culture' today, considered to be "Hebrew" or "Jewish"... non-significant to the American, or to the 'Gentile' Church (no such seperation). BUT... what I feel... is that "those things"-- HIS WAYS-- are still HIS WAYS. They have always been "Him". The Jews were (and are) 'that way' because they were instructed to be 'that way'... by YHWH. It's not a "Jewish" culture/lifestyle... it's a GOD culture/lifestyle.
I know this is a very controversial topic, and I am certainly not a scholar (nor do I feel one must be in order to understand YHWH or His ways). But I do feel it's very clear that what YHWH loves, He has always loved and will always love; what YHWH hates, He has always hated and will always hate. He may change His mind on matters of personal situations (like repenting of killing the children of Israel after Moses interceded for them, or like when he gave Hessekiah 15 more years to live, etc.) but HE will NOT change WHO He IS. HE IS YHWH and HE does NOT CHANGE. Therefore, I feel His ways still remain His desire and requirements for all humanity. It is simply the way He desires us to live, for the wellfare of all :)
That's my understanding at this point in my journey to learn more of my Father.
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The Sabbath of YHWH~
*YHWH probably always "kept" the Sabbath (or had intent for His creation to "keep" it)
Read Genesis 2:1-3
YHWH blessed the animals, man, and the seventh day (sabbath). He also sanctified it (set it apart for Himself). This was done in the very beginning- before what is called the "Law". Clearly (to me) this matters to Him... He "set the pattern" for life/living from the beginning.
Read Exodus 16:11-30
The context of this portion of the Scripture is telling about what happened shortly after YHWH brought the children of Israel out of Egypt through Moses-- and they just witnessed the parting of the Red Sea, and then murmured because they had nothing to drink or eat in the wilderness... when YHWH gives them manna to eat, He gives them instructions about gathering and eating it (this is happening- again- before the "Law"):
He explicitly commanded them (v.16) to do "double the work" on the sixth day, in preperation for the seventh day- which is called "the rest of the holy sabbath unto the LORD" (vs.23, 25-26). After some did not heed, verses 28 and 29 record: "And the LORD said unto Moses, How long refuse ye to keep my commandments and my laws? See, for that the LORD hath given you the sabbath,..." (this is BEFORE Ex. 20--when the "10 Commandments" were written on the tablets)
Once again, I find this to be a very clear picture of YHWH's heart. This must be important to Him... this, also, makes more since to me about why when the "10 Commandments" were given (a little later) that it was worded "Remember the sabbath day to keep it holy" (Ex.20:8). This wasn't something "new" to them that they were hearing for the first time. It was something they were already doing, and He made it clear that He wanted them to remember it as their way of life-- not forget-- but remember, and keep it holy.
It's His Sabbath... and He gave instruction "how" to "keep it" (Ex. 20:9-11). The sabbath rest is YHWH's wisdom. He even made provision for the land to "have a sabbath rest" every seven years (Ex. 23:10-12).
*A very important note:
Read Exodus 24:11-18
YHWH calls Moses up on the mount to receive "tables of stone, and a law, and commandments which He (YHWH) had written to teach them" (v.12). Moses stays in the mount "for forty days and forty nights" (v.18) receiving the "10 Commandments", among other instructions concerning the priesthood and tabernacle, etc. When Moses is ready to come back down to the people, YHWH points out this very important thing to him: READ EXODUS 31:12-18... YHWH didn't even emphasize 'Commandments 1,2,3' (concerning Himself) before Moses left the mount-- but He emphasized the Sabbath. That really caught my attention. The very last thing YHWH says to Moses to "remind" him to make sure he doesn't forget to tell the people, is about the Sabbath. For His own reasons, the Sabbath seems to be very important to Him.
I realize it is very common for "New Testament Christians" to say (believe) that "THAT was for 'THEM'". Well, were the other 9 Commandments only "for them"? Of coarse not. The "10 Commandments" are "WHO" YHWH 'IS'... it's "Him". I can't see seperating Him from "His Word", His will, or His ways.
It is also very commonly said/believed that the Sabbath was fulfilled in the Messiah, therefore we no longer have to keep it (or that it is 'okay' to switch it to the first day of the week, and "kind of" keep it-- our 'own' way). The Sabbath is a physical rest for our physical bodies that live in a physical world. If YHWH didn't intend for mankind to abide by it (always), why did He make it important and emphasize it even before the "10 Commandments" and "the Law" were given? And, why did He include it in the 10 Commandments... if it were going to be "done away with" at some point in time (knowing the other 9 commandments would remain)? The more I've read and considered it, it doesn't make sinse to me any other way.
It is common to hear some "New Testament Christians" of some denominations say they are "spiritual Jews"/ "spiritual Israel"... yet they seperate themselves from the Jews/Isreal-- thinking everything is "spiritual" and therefore does not apply. I do not agree. YHWH made plain His standard for living, and made a way for us to take part in that. "Christains" consider themselves to be "GOD's people", but do not live "GOD's way" that He gave to "His people". The Gentiles have been grafted into Israel, not Israel grafted into the Gentiles. YHWH is Elohiym, and He has one way for all people to live-- Jew and Gentile.
This is my understanding at this point in my journey to further understand my Father.
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